Had some fill up to my hug deficit today. Feels good, feels more balanced, you don’t notice the gap until you get some.
I did a thing yesterday…. I had this belt bag/fanny pack thing from my five year anniversary when we went to Hawaii – it seemed pretty perfect for my doctor visits right now, to hold my things, and be relatively easy to clean/disinfect after each. The clip on it broke. P ordered a replacement, and this required some quick sewing. Hand stitching. It was good to utilize these skills and fix this…. Felt pretty great to be able to put it back in action. Holding it without being able to clip it was less effective, doable but far less overall great.
One thing I did notice, that its time to get to that new eye doctor. I was however, super glad when I got this small little sewing package a few months back – before isolation things, that I had also gotten one of these little magnifying glass stand things, that worked out perfect for stitching.
P has perfected the Chaffle Pizza – so amazing, to be able to have pizza with virtually no carb – just egg/cheese for the crust, the thing not only looks beautiful, but tastes fabulous. No heaviness feeling afterwards either, so pizza is back on the menu again.
We got to go out this morning, to run an errand, and it felt pretty good. I got to sleep late, and when I got up, P asked what I was in the mood for…. I gave it some thought, and realized – totally out of character for me, that I was really in the mood for the pork ribs he had found the week before. This place is called Interstellar BBQ and apparently its run by a true chef – and it shows. The flavors are absolutely fantastic – I have for the entirety of my life been a avid no pork – with the exception of bacon – person my entire life, its just been a flavor that didn’t taste great to me. This pork rib is truly an exception – P told me its Mole marinade so maybe the chocolate makes the difference – can’t really taste it, and its not sweet at all – but the thing just melts in the mouth and has this incredible texture and taste. Was quite suprised to not only enjoy it last week, but find myself craving it today.
Recently I managed to finally use the recipe that my sister in law gave me, when she kindly came over to prep the parts for me to make these super tasty green drinks. There is a part of it that can be prepped before, and frozen to make the drink come together super easy, and she graciously has prepped them twice for me in the past. I was able to finally do the prep work myself. Feels pretty great, and I tried out the first one yesterday, they turned out really good. It feels pretty good to have been able to make it myself.
I am so grateful for the amazing people in my life. Always offering me inspiration, blessings, and optimism. They are like shining stars in my sky full of amazing possibilities, and always guiding me to be my best possible self. I am blessed for this, and while I am certain I don’t express my gratitude to them enough, I do work to ensure they know that I love them, and that I’m humbled by all of the warm well wishes I receive daily.
A small funny thing, with the current conditions requiring wearing a mask to all of my appointments, it was worth noticing that it impacted my oxygen level quite negatively when I was stuck delayed for my appt over an hour. It pushed my oxygen level down to a 94, when I usually run 97/98. After she took the first reading, I snuck my mask off my nose, while I was alone in the room for the next twenty minutes, and then asked her – when she checked on me – to run the test again – and of course the oxygen level was back to normal. Go figure.
I think tomorrow will be back to supplements day – having to stop them for the day before and a few days after chemo is really not ideal, but ensuring I don’t have conflicts between the two is probably the desired goal.
I got to imagine some things today with some people I care about, and I suddenly realized what John Lennon must have been feeling and envisioning when he wrote the song “imagine” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YkgkThdzX-8
This world, these times, they are hard. Its so easy to lose track of the fact that we have amazing things here, and there are more good than struggles. More things to bring us hope, promise of blessings, and things to be grateful for. I know I’m guilty of this, of getting lost and bogged down in the hardship, in the negativity.
I finally sat down and did something I’ve talked to my therapist about alot, and wrote myself an empowering picture. To remind myself, when days are hard, when I’m feeling lost, and tired, and uncertain if I’ve lost my way. To remind myself I know the way, and that while the path maybe foggy at that moment, it will be clear again, there will be rainbows again.
The bird family that decided to make the marigold in the back porch their nest, seems to have continued to feather there – even with me watering it once a day. I suppose this is the same for them as all the struggles I’m experiencing. Unless of course, its just like them enjoying rainy days – good thoughts and good things to ponder.
May your nests feather well, and maybe there always be light to guide your path. Here is hoping for more good days. Hugs are important.