The wonderful thing about Tiggers

Spring has sprung – or atleast it is so in Texas. The trees, I’m not sure what type they are, we have some of the white and pink blooms – some of them are dogwoods like the northeast, but others are just not dogwoods, and they just get these beautiful pink and purple blooms.

I have always enjoyed the colors this time of year in Texas. The green byways and open fields get these littering of colors. From the yellow, white, blue and red flowers that just pop up and color the landscape. The trees blossoming in their white, pink, purple and even yellow flowers all over the place. It makes outdoor walking so so enjoyable, to see these buds, to watch them fall and dance down into my hair and pave my steps. Its an incredible reminder how beautiful life is, and can be from one brief moment to another.

I did my morning walk today. Its not much, but I’m so thankful and happy for what I am able to do, and it was in these, the wee hours, where its still mostly dark, and the dew is falling, almost like rain on my jacket and headwrap. It wasn’t really cold, just a little bit cool, spring here is a hop from cold to warm to cold again within the same week. Right now its contentedly comfortable. I made it a little further today, each day I endeavor to see how far my steps can carry me comfortable before I feel that tug of my intuition telling me I’ve gone far enough.

Its easier to hear the intuition earlier, before my mind wakes enough to try and build all these barricades of thought, to bombard my intuition with a battlefield of logic and rational things to meander thru to get to the prize. That song love is a battlefield is no lie! Loving yourself the worst one of all.

P and I watched the coolest video to start the day yesterday, it was one of my favorite celebrities – Gordon Ramsey, visiting a girl with cancer for whom he was her hero. It was an incredible moving video, and a great way to start the day. My mind however, in the course of its battlefield of mental vs heart, immediately went to the fact that he brought her a ton of sugary delicious goodness – the worst possible thing he could have done for a cancer patient – and they weren’t even cooked by him. On the one hand, I was so happy for him to be visiting her, and so moved by the effort and gifts, which I’m certain were well enjoyed – I mean cancer patients love sweets, and sugar as much as the rest of the world; so does the cancer in our bodies – more so. On the other hand, my mind is like “BAD BAD BAD” – this is the same struggle personally I’m having…. with balance.

It often feels like I’m on the teeter totter of life. I instituted an accountability human for me a few months back, because while I recognize indulging in some of the amazing treats in life is an important part of enjoying it for me, balance in recognizing frequency is equally important, and its too easy to “forget” when you last “cheated” – I hate calling it cheating, its not really cheating, its allowing for some of that goodness that requires more restraint than our current state of society seems to indicate is normal.

I suppose a once in a life time opportunity meeting your hero, is definately one of those times to induldge in all of the beautiful delicious goodness life has to offer.

I am excited the necessary work at home sequestering that the current conditions have required. I’ll have company here, its not that I’ll have engagement, but I’ll have another pulse to share the space with, and somehow that just feels and sounds amazing. I’m taking it as a win for all the things I’ve had to change or cancel due to this circumstance. Another win would be the raised/elevated hygiene things that have spread, its good to know that we are re-educating adults on basic hygiene things, and that their lives and the lives of others now depend upon them mastering these lessons. Work hard people, I’d like us all to pass!

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