Balance

There was a song when I was growing up – hell I’m still growing up who am I kidding – but there was a song when i was “much younger” … by a group that I don;t think is even still “around” much anymore… Seven Mary Three The song was called “Cumbersome” – the lyric in this song that always comes back to me is “There is a balance between two worlds one with an Arrow and a cross” and then a little known lyric on one of the versions of the song “You must decide for yourself, between what is won and what is lost”

Life is perpetually sending me reminders “Balance in all things”…. that song, always comes to my mind when I’m getting another one of those little jiminy cricket moments, its like he is channeling the group and singing on my shoulder.

So infection seems gone… and I’ve been working to “reduce” my dependence on the Steroid that I’ve been taking since the last radiation. It has overall helped my health, and kept alot of very unpleasant symptoms under control. However, my intuition has told me that its time to reduce this as a part of my healing.

Also recently, I had the revelation that I was drinking a little bit much caffeine. I mean coffee – like all things is good in moderation, but its also not the only source of caffeine I imbibe nor is it little on the scale. As I’ve done in the past, I thought “Heck” lets do a detox from caffeine!

The universe was quick to remind me – balance in all things. Less than 24 hours after making this decision — I suddenly felt exhausted, and really really run down. Like 12+ hours sleep, with a nap, and that two days in a row.

Man what was wrong with me? I talked it out to P and he is like “Um, why are you giving up caffeine again? (He knows me so well, and he has been through a couple of these detox things in the past) and I’m … well I pause and realize Maaaaaaaybbbbbbee this isn’t the best time for this decision. So I get some coffee and like magic I suddenly feel better.

Balance in all things grasshopper. The time will come, the season to reduce caffeine, but this isn’t it…. reducing steroid is good for my overall health right now, and the caffeine will help deal with symptoms from that.

Had the RR workshop last night, and the lady went through the EFT as a tool for releasing suppressed emotions. As I know this is a HUGE thing for me – I’ve been doing this actively for months now, casually for a couple years…. I paid close attention. EFT is such a profound thing, I need to explore it more.

Its really cool to be doing this workshop with my mom. She has such a different perspective – and also some of the same perspective. Her takeaways are always very intriguing for me.

Next week is my next “performance reviews” — MRI< CT< Bone scan — then the week after will be the appts with the doctors to “review” the results. I will admit I was alot more nervous about those before the workshop last night, somehow it gave me a little spring in my step that these are going to be good reviews this time, and that I just need to keep focusing on the positive.

Roasted a pumpkin yesterday – and the seeds, which somehow I burned the seeds…. also I “learned” that the seeds can be (according to P – for more favorable taste/texture) shelled…. although the shells are very edible…. and “some” of the ones I roasted were still edible… I think its the spices that I used that actually burned, so next time a little lower temp, and a little longer on the roast, and shelled first 🙂 …. but I have to say OMG I’m so happy. The pumpkin turned out amazing. I can’t believe I have been confining myself to the can so so long. The true pumpkin was so easy to do, and tasted just as I’d been hoping/craving.

It makes the most AMAZING snack with a little greek yogurt. I roasted it with pumpkin pie spice & coriander — with a little avocado oil inside to keep it moist. The spices permeated through the shell and it just turned out so so so yummy.

I can’t believe its taken me this long to try this – I’ve roasted winter squash for a long time and just love them … but this was a first, and will DEFINATELY be repeated again. Had to have P help me with the in half cut, as I have always had a bit of a Knife restriction in my life – but even more so of late.

The balance is real, and for all the struggling I’ve been having to try and find a way to enjoy pumpkin without all the sugar, this was a true blessing. It satisfied my craving, so that itch now has a scratch.

I get to have my coffee, pumpkin and eat it too! aha Balance… Life is good.

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